Erotic spanking

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the-lover-and-the-hairbrush by Mitch after Midnight (2016).

Erotic spanking is a human sexual behaviour where spanking and sexual acts are closely combined and the spanking is given in a clearly erotic and not a disciplinary or a mere fun spanking fashion.


Erotic spanking can refer to more sexually intense forms of sensual spanking, where the aim is to go beyond sensual pleasure and into real sexual arousal. Erotic spanking is found as a form of BDSM play, but is also enjoyed in forms of play that are far from what is commonly understood by BDSM. Erotic spanking, with or without roleplay, is popular as a light kinky form of foreplay, followed by more "vanilla" forms of sexual activity such as petting, masturbation, oral, anal or vaginal sexual intercourse.

Another possiblility is to spank a partner during sexual activity, e.g. while having sex in the cowgirl or the reverse cowgirl position, to "bring them on" and add spice to the sex. Erotic spanking can be done in any pairing - M/F, F/M, M/M or F/F, but M/M and F/F is typically only found in homosexual couples whereas M/F and F/M is common with heterosexuals. In adult spanking fiction, watching or reading about F/F spanking is also highly popular among heterosexual men, while M/M spanking is popular among heterosexual women.

While consensual spanking has an erotic, non-disciplinary purpose, it is often given under the pretext of punishment in a role play scenario. This takes the form of a fantasy spanking game or ritual in which an embarrassing and intimate punishment session increases the erotic excitement for both spankophiles.

In BDSM relationships, consensual non-consent gives the dominant partner the authority to enforce genuine discipline on the submissive party at will. This is a form of power exchange that retains the safe, sane and consensual principle and use of safe words.


The Indian Kama Sutra goes into specific detail on how to properly strike a partner during sex. It is also likely that cultures in Western antiquity, such as the Romans, knew about the aphrodisic powers of flogging and spanking. The earliest mention of erotic spanking in modern time dates to approximately the Renaissance, but its secrets and details did not become too well known until the Victorian era. Sexually-motivated spanking and whipping was called The English Vice in those days.


Buttocks are erogenous zones. Any activity with the buttocks, including spanking, can build sexual arousal. Spanking also sends vibrations into the genital area which can act erogenously there. In erotic spanking among consenting adults, it is acceptable to combine spanking with erotic touch, on the buttocks but also above, below and between the thighs. Slightly brushing with your fingers near the spankee's anus and genitals will definitely add sensation. Stretching the skin around the anus and/or vulva can also add pleasure. Another possibility is slipping a finger in, interspersing spanks with masturbation of the partner, or careful spanking on the labia or penis.

One author called spanking a female in the over-the-knee position as "fantastic" for indirect clitoris stimulation:

...your sub can writhe against your lap while you spank them, making them the filling of a delicious pain/pleasure sandwich. *sexually frustrated sigh*
  — Kate Sloan: 10 Fun Ways to Indirectly Stimulate the Clit

Beside the mere physical aspects, spanking can also arouse both partners because it acts on sadomasochistic triggers in the brain related to the erotic components of domination, submission, punishment, shame, humiliation, power, helplessness, etc.

It is possible, although rare in practice, to stimulate a spankee to climax merely from an erotic spanking. Otherwise the partners can simply enjoy spanking as an erotic game without a need to reach orgasm, or they can switch from spanking to manual, oral, anal and/or vaginal intercourse once arousal has reached a desired point, to find sexual release.

Erotic spanking, spanking fetishism and BDSM[edit]

More formal forms of erotic spanking, such as with implements, fetish clothing and/or using bondage, are generally regarded as a BDSM activity, although many spanking fetishists don't consider themselves true sadomasochists because their interest is more or less exclusively in spanking.

Those strongly interested in giving or receiving erotic spankings are sometimes known as spankophiles or spankos, a term that is often considered synonymous to spanking fetishists, but includes also people for whom spanking is more sensation play than a sexual fetish, and people who never act out spanking in real life but fantasize about it. Examples of celebrity spankophiles include the philosopher Jean-Jacques Rousseau (1712-1778) and the poet Algernon Swinburne (1837-1909).


See also[edit]